Lemon Balm Coaching
Welcome to The Lemon Balm Coaching Podcast
Life after 40 isn’t the end of the story—it’s the start of an incredible new chapter. 🌿
Here on The Lemon Balm Coaching Podcast, we’re all about helping women over 40 rediscover joy, purpose, and freedom. Whether you’re navigating empty nest syndrome, feeling stuck in the daily grind, or just wondering what’s next, this is your space to pause, reflect, and grow.
Each week, we’ll dive into inspiring topics, actionable tips, and heartfelt stories that empower you to:
✨ Reignite your passion for life.
✨ Embrace the freedom of this season.
✨ Create a future full of lightness, purpose, and joy.
It’s not about having it all figured out—it’s about taking the next step, one moment at a time. You’ve spent so much of your life giving to others; now it’s your turn to shine.
🎧 Join us every other Wednesday for a new episode, and let’s make this chapter your best one yet.
Your next chapter begins here. 🌟
Lemon Balm Coaching
Faith, Leadership, and Finding Your Fire
What if the secret to leadership success isn't finding perfect balance, but mastering the art of the pendulum swing? Jennifer Brown, former US Foreign Service Officer turned leadership coach, reveals why traditional work-life balance is a myth that keeps high-achieving leaders trapped in cycles of burnout and depletion.
Drawing from her powerful personal story of physical breakdown after years of putting achievement before well-being, Jennifer shares the exact moment she realized her leadership approach wasn't sustainable. "I had wonderful boss who said to me: 'you have to put your own oxygen mask on first,'" she recalls. "It was like this gut punch—I'm not putting my oxygen mask on first, and how can I pour into my family, my son, my team at work when I'm so depleted?"
This candid conversation explores the revolutionary concept of being the "CEO of your life" by intentionally directing your energy pendulum between priorities rather than attempting impossible balance. You'll discover practical techniques to interrupt negative thought patterns in seconds (without leaving your desk), how to identify your purpose through three revealing questions, and why defining yourself through achievement creates an unsustainable identity that eventually collapses.
Jennifer's faith-centered approach offers a refreshing perspective on leadership development, emphasizing grace for yourself and others while building mental fitness practices that fit into your existing routines. For leaders feeling lost, overwhelmed, or wondering "is this all there is?", this episode provides both comfort and actionable strategies to reclaim your energy and purpose.
The ripple effect of your leadership transformation affects everyone around you—are you ready to put your oxygen mask on first and discover what's possible when you lead from a place of wholeness rather than depletion?
Connect with Jen:
Finding Our Fire Facebook Community
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Are you a woman over 40 who is on the verge of a mental or physical breakdown? Are you ready to invite peace, joy, and excitement into your life again? Download 5 Tips to Feel Joy Again in Under 20-Mintues AND Join the Reignite Your Flame Group on Facebook where women, just like you, come together to support, encourage, and connect.
Music by Adipsia
Friends, I am so excited to invite my good friend, jen Brown, to the podcast today. Jen is a life and leadership coach who partners with clients at the holy crap, what now? Crossroads. Whether leaders are stepping into first time or higher leadership roles, they're craving reinvention or they're stuck in the fog of burnout or self-doubt. She empowers them to find their purpose, develop tangible action steps and create the energy and ripple effect to inspire others. She brings experience working in high pressure environments, drawing on her two decade career as a foreign service officer with the US Department of State, where she also served as a leadership coach. She's an associate certified coach through the ICF and a certified professional co-active coach from the Co-Active Training Institute.
Speaker 1:Welcome to the Lemon Balm Coaching Podcast, your cozy corner of the world where we'll sip on life's lessons and squeeze the most out of every moment. I'm Melissa, your coach, cheerleader and maybe even a little bit like that mom who always has a warm hug and the best advice waiting for you. If you're a woman over 40, feeling like life's left you a little lost, aimless or downright stuck, you're in the right place. This is where your joy, your freedom and your purpose come back into focus. Together we'll laugh, learn and rediscover what makes you come alive. Because it's not too late, this is your time, so grab a cup of something warm, settle in and let's start creating the next most beautiful chapter of your life together. Jennifer, I am so glad that you joined me on the podcast today, because we've had conversations before and we're kind of in the same area of coaching, but with a little bit of a different twist, and I just love that you wanted to come on here and support the listeners of my show. So thank you so much.
Speaker 2:Well, thank you so much, Melissa, for having me because, as you and I chatted before, we share values and I think we share certain life experiences and faith, and being able to lift people up is, I think, so important to both of us. We do focus on lifting women in particular. I also look at the leadership role that women occupy, leading from wherever they are, at home, in the community, at work. It's where we are extending influence and I just I appreciate that you and I have that same heart value.
Speaker 1:Agree, I appreciate it so much too and I love the fact that faith is such a big part of what you do. And even though I don't bill myself as a Christian coach right, everything I do leads from that world worldview. And when I work with my clients, that's always kind of in the back of my mind is how are we connecting with that which is greater, whom I call God, right, that which is greater in our life experience? So I just love that we both kind of share that and it's a big part of what we do.
Speaker 2:Absolutely, and I just want to dive into that upfront because 100% that is my foundation and I do meet clients wherever they are If they want to bring their faith, their spirituality, into, into coaching. Wonderful, and I embrace that. With some clients we actually pray. With some clients we just know that that's a piece of what they're looking to do is to deepen their spirituality and their faith. My company name, my coaching name, is Journey of Grace, so that extends itself into that discussion upfront with clients and I just believe that by putting that out there, the right people find you, they find what they're looking for, and so you know, I think that when we deepen our own faith, we draw in people who are seeking more of that support.
Speaker 2:I spent 23 years with the US Department of State, so I know diplomacy. I was a foreign service officer living abroad for about 11 years and spending the rest of my time in Washington. I get diplomacy and in the faith space in this new chapter, I feel I am being called to be God's ambassador. So using that diplomacy, if you will, in a way that aligns with my heart and my faith, I love that aligning with your heart.
Speaker 1:That's, you're speaking my language, but I want to dive into this idea that you shared with me about work life balance. So let's just like I mean, let's just throw aside all the fluff and just dive right in Like, what is it that you believe about work-life balance? Because I think words really matter and the words that we choose really, really matter, and you're choosing to use the word balance.
Speaker 2:Yes In quotes. So let me see, yes, I see it in front of me. You're like work-life balance, yes. So let me back up, because your last episode truly resonated with me and you were so focused on Empty, by Jackson Brown. My son is named Jackson Brown, not intentionally, but for that reason. Not intentionally for that reason, but for my whole career.
Speaker 2:I would always joke that I was running on empty, like my son is Jackson and I'm running on empty, and so I use that humor as a way to deflect the pain I was carrying from being so exhausted, so burned out, that I was losing myself. And so when people talk about work-life quote balance, it just makes me have that like feeling in my stomach because it doesn't exist, right, it just doesn't exist. We can use the fluff words, but I have just, I've created my own invention on this and I call it it's a pendulum, and we are the CEOs of our lives, are the CEOs of our lives? We have to know when to make that pendulum intentionally swing to the work side, to the personal side, to the community side, to ourselves, right? So wherever you are in your life, it's your responsibility and privilege to know how to make that pendulum swing. Is it easy? No, of course not, and so it requires that intentional work of being self-aware.
Speaker 2:I had a wonderful boss, mentor and coach all wrapped in one during my time with the Department of State, and as he was coaching me one time he said to me you have to put your own oxygen mask on first. Now, that's a quote we've heard before. Right, we hear it on airplanes, we hear it wherever, but it just it was like this gut punch of I'm not putting my oxygen mask on first, and how can I pour into my family, into my son, into my team at work, how can I be that best leader when I'm so depleted? And so I really realized I have to bring this pendulum back over to me first, and from there then I can start to do some shifts and I really incorporate the Pareto principle, the 80-20 principle. I don't do it perfectly, none of us do but the whole point is where is that 20% in my life where I really need that pendulum to be okay? Focus right here. And then how, intentionally, do I decide when the priorities need to shift to the next 20%?
Speaker 1:Yeah, but you said it's not easy.
Speaker 2:No.
Speaker 1:It's not easy to figure out how to direct that pendulum and I'm just going to jump here and say there is a reason that Jen and I do what we do right, and I hope you can hear it in her voice she is trying to help leaders learn how to direct that pendulum so that they're not depleted right? We do what we do because we lived through it on our own, without support 100%. Right and I did have some support 100% and I did have some support.
Speaker 2:I don't want to deny that it was from that place of being a burned out leader I got my first leadership coach.
Speaker 1:But we had to get to that space where I'm like I am burnt out. In my case, my body was failing me. I was falling apart, baby, right, I was falling. I was falling apart, baby, and like, who do I turn to? You know, I went to my medical doctors. They couldn't help me. I went to a therapist. She helped a little, but, like I had, I had to figure it out on my own. And that's why we say it's not easy. But I guarantee you, if you work with a coach, it's not that it's easy, but it's much easier because somebody who's been there before they're walking with you, they're helping you, they're showing you the path that they walked to accomplish what they did. So I mean, I just wanted to jump in and say that, because I don't really generally say that to people, right, I don't do that. I'm not going to push what I do on you, but right now I just felt like, oh my gosh, people need to know it's not easy if you're trying to do it on your own.
Speaker 2:So so true, right, the whole idea of coaching is that we can guide you and walk with you, beside you, to get to those places. Those answers the results that you want, so much faster than if you do it on your own. I spent 10, a good 10 plus years of living with chronic neck and shoulder pain, because that's where I carry my my stress, and it was like to the point I couldn't turn my neck Right. So that's not a healthy place, but I didn't know coaching was really out there and so and in fact, I want to put a plug out to our sisters in the younger generation, because I am hearing more podcasts, more people focused on how to get that clarity before they're at the burnout place, and that's exactly what we should be doing. We should be walking with them and serving as models of. I hope you do reflect and be intentional much sooner than I did. There's no need to carry that stress in your body. Right, and I will put a plug out there.
Speaker 2:I was just on this wonderful podcast from someone who hosted MLED. The podcast is Wrestling With Life and she's focused on her target audience people in their 20s to early 30s. I love that she is so intentional about wrestling with these questions, right? How can we support each other and lift each other up so that we put our pain to purpose for them and for others, right? Yes?
Speaker 1:I love that, love that. Yeah, deep breath. I know, just deep breath, but you've got me thinking like of our grandparents and our parents who, like, never talked about any of this stuff and at least we're here at this stage going. It doesn't have to be that way it doesn't have to be that way.
Speaker 1:I'm helping the women in our age group right, Overcome all of this stuff because we've realized this isn't right. I shouldn't be feeling this way at this point in my life. That's right. Our grandmothers and our mothers they just did it because they had no choice. I actually have a choice, Right. And and the next generation has a choice now, Like they don't have to wait until they get here. They can do it now because we're showing them it doesn't have to be this way.
Speaker 2:And we're showing them in social. I mean for all the negatives of social media, the positives are that we have platforms to share this information much sooner. Yes, absolutely.
Speaker 1:Which leads me to my next question about finding purpose. Yeah, that's one of the things that I work on with my clients is like we want to be excited about life again, and part of that excitement comes from knowing your purpose. Right, I don't know about you, but I mean, for most of my life I just flew by the seat of my pants. Whatever was next is what I did, but I didn't know my purpose until recently. Now my kids knew it. They could see it clearly, what my purpose was, what my passion is. It took me a lot longer to figure it out, but like what are your thoughts on purposes as it relates to your coaching practice and who you serve? Yeah, I love this.
Speaker 2:So I also will say I kind of started by the seat of my pants. When I started with the State Department I took the test on a whim. I didn't fully know what I was getting into and what a privilege it was to serve the United States. I also found part of my calling in that service by specifically working with US citizens and visa applicants overseas. Like being able especially to help US citizens in their most dire circumstances overseas just filled my heart. So I knew there was an element of service that truly spoke to me. It was then as a leader. When I hit my burned out stage and I had a leadership coach, I saw what doing the inner work could do on me to ripple out into my team and lift them, lift the production, lift the morale, like really come together, and I just became so passionate about leadership work in that space. Then I had some personal downfalls we'll say some trials and I went through personal coaching and I saw, oh my gosh, I can rise again.
Speaker 2:Personally, it was really at that point of hitting rock bottom that I knew I wanted to be in coaching.
Speaker 2:I want to serve people who need that holistic approach of I'm lost. I'm so numb I don't know where to go and I'm supposed to show up at work with this happy face and compartmentalize, but we're not meant to do that. Yes, we have to, sometimes right Professionally, and yet we as people are meant to show up as our full selves and live in our full worth, and I wasn't so. I knew that's where my pain to purpose was, was calling me. I knew that's where my pain to purpose was calling me, and what I love is that on this journey I have continued to grow so much through my coaching certification, through working with my clients and seeing their aha moments and just celebrating their shifts, also in the tough moments when it's really hard and those transformations are not immediate, right, and so that privilege and honor of standing in the mud with them and feeling the feels as they find their purpose and their way out of their pain point. So part of the work I'm doing right now is I'm in a John Maxwell leadership certification program.
Speaker 1:I was just going to ask you about that. I'm familiar with John Maxwell and everything that he's doing and I was like, oh, this is so cool, okay.
Speaker 2:It's been a dream for years, and I have goosebumps because I'm now in a stage of life where I am doing this, I'm taking a leap of faith. Right? It's not. It's not a small investment financially, emotionally, mentally, time-wise it's. It is a, it's a commitment, it's an intentional way of adding value for me and for my clients, and so one of the quotes that I or, yeah, one of the things I want to pull out from his book of intentional living is that regarding purpose. John asked three main questions to help us get to our why. What do you cry about, what do you sing about and what do you dream about? And if you answer those questions and think about the things that are on the should list in your life and I'm doing should in quotes, because should to me can be like this negative judgment voice in our heads, and if we use, though, the should in a good way of I should be doing this, well then what is it about that should that is calling to you and your purpose?
Speaker 1:Yeah, yeah what do I dream about? I ask my, I ask people this question all the time. Could you just imagine a world? This is my dream. Could you just imagine a world where everyone is walking around healing? Yes, literally, that's my dream, like could you? Just imagine that world.
Speaker 2:Yes, yes, I can.
Speaker 1:And that is part of my purpose. Like I am passionate about the people that I serve, I'm passionate about lifting people up, and it's for that reason because could you just imagine a world where people are walking around healing? Yes, you know we're never going to be perfect. We know this. We know we're never going to achieve perfection, but we can be on that path toward it.
Speaker 1:And healing and continuing to heal and heal. And when an old wound surfaces, go, oh, that needs healing now. Or when an old thought pattern resurges, you can go oh, that needs healing now. Or when an old thought pattern resurges, you can go oh, that needs my attention now, you know. And just being on that healing, path?
Speaker 2:Yes, 100%, and I think that's where the intersection of leadership and personal growth come together. For me, it goes back to as leaders, we have so much power to create the ripple effect, the impact on our families, on the teams we lead, the communities where we serve and live. And so, even if we walk down the street and just make eye contact with someone and give a smile, how many times are those small yet significant acts showing someone? I see you and you matter?
Speaker 2:I share this story and I don't know why I'm sharing this, but in two major cities, new York City, and in Buenos Aires, argentina I would walk down the street as I was visiting and staying there for a little while, and you know, these are like big kind of cold cities, right, Like people are just busy, move, move, move. I would make it a competition of how many people can I make eye contact with and say hello to, and sometimes people would just kind of give me like this what are you doing? What's wrong with you, look? And yet I was always surprised by the number of people who would smile and like wonder of like this person actually is looking at me. Yeah, and I thought it doesn't matter. I am doing this because this feels right to connect with people.
Speaker 1:Absolutely Well. That's one of my core, foundational beliefs is, I believe we were designed for connection and community. We weren't designed to live in isolation, and if COVID taught us anything, it's that we are not designed for isolation, even if you're an introvert 100% we are not designed for isolation, even if you're an introvert.
Speaker 1:My whole family, other than me and my oldest son, are introverts. They need time alone to recharge, but they always come back to people. We always come back to people. We need to be with people. We were designed for connection with God first and then connection with others, and without that we suffer. We suffer greatly.
Speaker 2:We just suffer, we do suffer and we all need that space to connect with God and ourselves. First Right, and it's that inner work of being thoughtful so that we can show up fully when we are present. And you know, sometimes I think that there's like this stigma that extroverts just go, go, go and don't need that reflection period. And I'm pretty much an extrovert, I just love being out and about. Yet I am so inspired by my time alone in nature in particular, as my connection place. It goes back to that how am I putting my oxygen mask on so that I can then go, go, go in a thoughtful way, not just to be busy?
Speaker 1:And that's a huge difference because I was. I was a doer, oh yeah, before I began my healing journey and it was about getting things done. And I still want to get things done. That part of me is still there. I haven't thrown that part of myself out the window. I still love to get things done. I'm still very task oriented, but it's not for the sake of doing the task anymore. There's things that just need to be done, but that's not for the sake of doing the task anymore. Right, there's things that just need to be done, but that's not who I am anymore. That was kind of how I judged my worth was how much I could get done in a day, and that's not who I am anymore. I'm still a doer, but it's not my worth.
Speaker 2:Okay.
Speaker 2:So now I'm going to start geeking out a little bit into some of the coaching because that whole idea of defining our worth by success, of checking off the to-do list yes, oh, my goodness. Okay, I've wrestled with this my entire life because I learned from an early age that perfection and doing equaled accomplishment and success and praise and promotion, and I didn't have that foundation of inner self-worth. It's not that I was raised to feel that way necessarily, and I will put that caveat out there because I really want to dive in here for a minute. I'm also doing work in the positive intelligence space that was founded by Shirzad Shamim and he wrote the book on positive intelligence, and what I love about this work is that it dives into our inner thoughts, our operating system in the brain, and really some of the most critical thoughts that we have about ourselves formed from our childhood, from like as early as age five.
Speaker 1:Before we ever really had any cognitive thought.
Speaker 2:Exactly yes, and these thoughts were really built on underlying strengths. So when I look at my sense of doing and accomplishing, I know that my strengths are that I'm task oriented, I'm detail oriented, I'm a strategic thinker, I have that ability to connect the dots and pull things together. So there are true strengths there, right are true strengths there, right. And what I learned is that by overusing those strengths, I defined myself in a way that created this negative loop of I'm going to beat myself up if it's late, if it's not perfect, if I'm not pleasing people, if I'm not doing the next best thing to define success in quotes. And so that became my identity.
Speaker 2:And let me tell you, go through some personal transitions, transitioning from your longstanding career and your kid going off to college, and you will question your identity. How do I know? Because that was me within the last several years. And so I really had to get real with myself and my thoughts. Who am I and where is my worth? Is it really my job, my career, is it really that I'm a mom? And those things are part of it, but they're not me fully.
Speaker 2:And so, as I started diving into this positive intelligence, tq work, what I realized is, oh my gosh, these negative, inner critic thoughts are on autopilot and they're just bam, bam bam going through my mind without me even being aware of what's going on. I love mindfulness, don't get me wrong. We need it. The first step, though, is that we have to be aware of what these thoughts are and we have to catch them. And then, from that catching these, what Shirzad Shamim calls the saboteur voices from catching them, we actually get to make a choice of shifting into the wiser, what he calls more sage region of our brain right, the more creative space of taking the step back and looking at the strengths that are available to us and how we are going to act. And I say act, not react, because from the sage place, we are being intentional, whereas from the autopilot, saboteur place, we are reacting in a way that does not serve us.
Speaker 1:So I just want to say that this is absolutely 100% what I love about coaching, because we we realize things about ourselves, we have. We come to this space where we can see something clearly and then we have a choice. Yes, before we could, before we could see it, there was no choice. Right, I was stuck on autopilot, there was nothing I could do about it, because I didn't even realize there was a problem. Right, I know there's something wrong, but I don't know what the problem is. Right, and then I start coaching and I start working on this, the inner child and all these thought patterns and stuff, and you see, and you, finally the light bulb goes on. Right, and you see something clearly. And then you have a choice I can keep doing that, I absolutely can, sure, I can keep doing that, or I can choose to do differently, but until I see that, until I see it, I can't do anything about it.
Speaker 2:I've said this so many times in this this is what I love about coaching, because you're like there.
Speaker 1:It is there and as the coach right and I'm working with my clients I see the light. I see the light come on in a moment and everything changes. That's right, Everything. And when I say everything changes, I mean everything changes, not just that one thing we were working on, because, because everything in life, now I can see it easier, I can see it clearer and now I have choices.
Speaker 2:So this goes back right. Martha Beck, one of the founders in this space, would say the mind produces the evidence for what you want to see. Yes, absolutely so. If we are not aware of the choices, the mind is going to see all those negative things on the repeat button, yep. And once we're aware that we have choices, more choices start to come in, yes, yes. And so like we start to see and this is where I get the goosebumps, I know it is so transformational in how we can show up and how we can be ourselves and find that self-worth that's not defined by quote success.
Speaker 1:Yes, and the other thing I love about coaching is the ripple effect lasts long after I'm finished working with a client. I'm finished working with a client, I have clients reaching out three, four, six months after saying, oh my gosh this. And it's like yes, I'm like yes, this is amazing, oh my gosh and I get all fired up again. Even though I'm technically not working with them anymore, I'm still getting benefit of their transformation. It is just incredible.
Speaker 2:So I was a leadership coach, also within the Department of State, in addition to my regular duties there, and I loved that work and one of my clients from there, the best compliment was I'm channeling your inner voice, and it's not that it's about me, because it's not. The point is she got it. She was aware of the options she had and how she chose to think, and this gets me into results. Right, because we all want something in particular. We don't want to be in the pain point. Melissa, you and I share a business coach, and so our clients don't want to be stuck in their pain point. They want to get out of it, right. And so when I first became aware of coaching 15 years ago or so, I listened to Brooke Castillo's the Life Coaching School, and her model is one that many have had. Right, the circumstances are neutral, and then you have a thought. From the thought, you have a feeling, then you have an action, and then you create a result, basic model of what we want or what will happen, right? I personally like to reverse engineer this, though, because what's the result that we want? We don't want to be in the pain point, because what's the result that we want, we don't want to be in the pain point. So what is it that we want? We don't want to be stuck, we don't want to be numb, we don't want to be sitting in the car crying when we get home from work because we just can't face going in the house. We're exhausted. So what do we want? I want to be happy to go inside and see my kids. I want to be happy with my team and empowering them and lifting them up, and I want energy. I want to feel that physically, mentally, spiritually, I am all my game. And so, from knowing what that result that we want is, then let's take a step back and what actions would get us to that result? Right, right. And so then, through coaching, we work through the actions, so we know actions are needed.
Speaker 2:Then what feelings are we going to need to feel to motivate us to take these hard actions? And I say hard because they're intentional If you want the result that you want, it's not going to happen overnight and you're going to have to work, and this is where the coach can help you be inspired to do this. And it's your commitment to have these feelings. But you know what? You can't just jump to a feeling of I'm inspired today.
Speaker 2:I had four hours of sleep and I'm inspired today. That's not going to happen. So what thoughts do we need to bring into this model to get to the feeling of being inspired? And the thought is where we get to stop that inner critic and say I'm making a choice and these are the thoughts I need to cultivate to get to that place. And so when my client tying this back to what my client had shared about channeling she was doing the work, she was looking at the end result that she wanted and knowing the steps she needed to take to get there and channeling that thought as the number one step.
Speaker 1:Yeah, absolutely. If I don't know where I want to go, I cannot lay out a path to get there. I don't care if we're talking about our thoughts or a road trip. If I don't know where I want to go, I can't lay out the path to get there. I don't care if we're talking about our thoughts or a road trip.
Speaker 1:If I don't know where I want to go. I can't lay out the path to get there. And unfortunately, in our society it's so easy to focus on the problem. We watch a commercial. All they do is focus on the problem. They focus on the. Everything focuses on the problem. It's easy to focus on the. Everything focuses on the problem. It's easy to focus on the problem. It's it's intentional to focus on the outcome, to focus on the result, to focus on the solution. And that takes. That takes work, just like you're saying it takes. I have to do the work to be able to shift that thought process and it doesn't just, oh, the toxic positivity drives me crazy. Right, just meditate, just use essential oils, just do this, and all those things are wonderful. I'm not saying that they're not. But just doing that is not going to shift everything for you. It's a process and it requires knowing what you want everything for you.
Speaker 2:It's a process and it requires knowing what you want. Yes, they are tools in the toolkit, absolutely so the mindfulness, the meditation, the baths, the massages.
Speaker 2:I love all of that right, but that in and of itself is not going to get me from A to B, and so, in fact, you know, going back to the PQ work, what I love about the positive intelligence is the focus on mental fitness, and I can't tell you how many times I'm in public or somewhere where I'm like I don't have a couple minutes to go, like do some mindfulness, like do some mindfulness longer. Exercises per se, right, like meditating. Breathing is always available to us wherever we are, and so that, of course, is one of my go-tos. Another one that I really will go to is rubbing two fingertips together, like really deeply where I feel the fingertip and the skin, and then, you know, kind of rubbing my fingertips down from fingertip to palm on each hand. Doing that for 10 to 30 seconds can snap a negative thought, so that then I can be back in that what's possible realm, right, but notice that I had to do something here, right?
Speaker 1:It didn't just, I didn't just shift a thought. No, there's work to be done.
Speaker 2:There's work to be done In that moment it.
Speaker 1:I had a nurse say to me one time they had someone come in to teach them all about self-care and stress relief and stuff like that, and the one thing she took away from the whole 30 minute talk was I don't have time to just stop and focus on my breathing. And I love to remind people we don't have to stop every single thing that we're doing to shift right. We can still be doing and shifting at the same time, but it takes practice, it takes awareness, it takes you know there's work to be done. I don't have time to just stop everything I'm doing and go over here and do some, you know, do some meditation. But I can stand and rub my fingers and I can think differently and I can believe differently in the moment, but I still have to do the work.
Speaker 2:And so what if we all brush our teeth? Hopefully, right so? We're brushing our teeth and we're aware of what the toothbrush feels like, right and what if we're aware of that first cup of coffee, the taste, or the tea or whatever? These are things that we do in our lives anyway. So how do we attach a mental?
Speaker 2:fitness rep to that habit, because if we have to create a new habit and more time, yeah, that's not probably going to serve us because we are busy. So how can we start? Simple, in a way that sets us up for success. One of the things I love, I love Mel Robbins. So one of the things I love about Mel Robbins is her just real approach to life. And she says I'm still working on this one because I still work in that self-worth space. But one thing she said is, as you're in the bathroom in the morning to brush your teeth, give yourself a high five in the mirror. And that ties back to Byron Katie, who started with the yourself.
Speaker 2:I love you in the mirror when I was first starting in the self-worth space. That was a leap a little too far for me. I couldn't look at myself and say that in the mirror, so I started with the I want to love you. And then I got to I like you, I like this, you know, I like my eyes, whatever space was available to me. And what I'm getting at, though, is these are habits that I could easily easily quote do, because I was already standing in front of the mirror to brush my teeth. It wasn't that I went to the bathroom with the intent of doing those things. I attached them to something I was already doing.
Speaker 1:So we're coming down to the end of our time, but I want to talk to you all day. I know, but I you know we got to podcast, you know, make it by and make it absorbable and chewable and I know I just love.
Speaker 1:I love you and I love this conversation Like if people wanted to find you, if they're like, I really like Jen, I like the things that she's saying. I think I'd like to know more. Maybe I'm not ready to work with her yet, but I like her and I think I'd like to know more. How do they, how do they get in touch with you, how do they find you?
Speaker 2:I love that, thank you. So I have a website, journeyofgracecoachingcom. I am revamping it, so bear with me on that one. I also have a Facebook group called Finding Our Fire. It is really that whole idea of lifting women in their purpose and encouraging them to be their light, for that ripple effect of inspiring others. I'm on Instagram, jen underscore, journey of grace, and LinkedIn, jen Brown, dash coach.
Speaker 1:Awesome, and if somebody is listening and they're like I don't know if she's the right, like I don't know if I should follow her, Like who should? Who should be following you, who should be checking out your website and who should be joining your group? Who?
Speaker 2:should be checking out your website and who should be joining your group. Well, I love that.
Speaker 1:First, I just want to say there are so many wonderful coaches out there, oh, but I'm just going to jump in here right now. I have sat, like we have the same business coach, yes, yeah, and I have sat under other business coaches because in my business I knew I was floundering, I didn't know what to do, so I would go through their masterclasses and stuff and usually by the end of the masterclass I knew if they were not the right coach for me.
Speaker 2:That's right, that's right.
Speaker 1:I'm like nope, not for you, are not for me. And you're right, there's so many different coaches, there's so many different flavors and even though you and I serve a similar audience, we're different people.
Speaker 2:We are. Yeah, our styles are different, and that's what makes it great.
Speaker 1:Exactly, and I could be the juiciest peach in the box that we share, and somebody is not going to like the peach that I am, but they might love you. So Right, no, thank you.
Speaker 2:Right, no, thank you, thank you. So I love working with clients who are facing the leadership struggles particularly women, but all clients in that leadership space where they are just so feeling overwhelmed, lost, burned out, struggling to find their identity and purpose, struggling to find their identity and purpose. And the reason I love that is because I've been there and I know it, and so I look forward to walking with clients to help them get to that other side where so much joy and energy is there to be the light.
Speaker 1:We started by talking about faith. We started by talking about our faith and I would love to end that way. We started by talking about our faith and I would love to end that way. Yes, anything at all that you would like to share around that?
Speaker 2:Yes, so in the midst of one of the worst seasons of my life, my pastor was one of my support team members and she really reminded me of Romans 5. And I just believe in all things, basically the perseverance to get us to that place of hope and ditching shame, ditching shame. And it was really through that verse where grace entered my life in such a way that shifted me, and that is why grace is a part of my company name, because the importance of accepting grace for ourselves and giving it to others is what makes it so that we can all be better.
Speaker 1:Well. Again, thank you for sharing this time, this space, with me. Thank you for sharing your heart with my listeners Appreciate you so so, so much. I'm going to include links to your group and your website in the show notes so people don't have to go searching for it. It's right there and you know if, if, if you're in this leadership position and you're looking for a coach, it would be Jen. It's not me right, that's not my forte. Sure, I could help you, but you know what the great thing about being a coach is knowing other coaches who have the skills to help the people that I don't.
Speaker 2:So it's, it is wonderful that we have that abundant network so that we can do right for our clients, absolutely.
Speaker 1:And anytime you have a conversation, I would just want to encourage everybody Anytime you have a conversation with a coach, you know, decide is this the right one for me? And if it's not, ask them hey, I don't. I would never be offended if someone said I don't think you're the right coach for me and if it's not, ask them, hey, I don't, I don't. I would never be offended if someone said I don't think you're the right coach for me. Do you have anyone else that I could talk to?
Speaker 2:I'd be like.
Speaker 1:I have a whole list of people. What exactly are you looking for?
Speaker 2:Right and and the other, the flip side of that is for yourselves. Just advocate for yourself advocate for yourself as a client and as a coach. We also have a responsibility to say I don't think I'm the right fit for you, and I have someone in my network who might be Absolutely.
Speaker 1:Absolutely, oh, so wonderful, completely different than other fields, really, yes, yes, love what we do. Love you, jen, and thank you so much. Thanks so much for spending a little time with me today on the Lemon Balm Coaching Podcast. I hope you're walking away with something that sparks joy, hope or a fresh perspective for your journey. If you loved today's episode, let's keep the conversation going. You can find more inspiration, coaching tips and resources over at my website, lemonbalmcoachingcom. Don't forget to follow me on social media for encouragement and updates, and you'll find me on Instagram and Facebook at Lemon Balm Coaching. And hey, if you're looking for a supportive, uplifting community of amazing women just like you, come join us in the Reignite your Flame Facebook group. It's a safe, welcoming space where we share, grow and cheer each other on, and you can find the link on my website or just search for Reignite your Flame on Facebook. Remember, honey, just be yourself. The world needs what only you have to offer. Take care and I'll see you in the next episode.
